Affliction Guild

Affliction has been kicking some serious ass this week. SSC bosses have fallen in our path like the puny insects they really are. After a short adjustment period to some internal changes, I think it’s safe to say we are back on track and taking names in a big way.

With the first half of SSC cleared the previous night, Thursday saw us zone back in with the sole purpose of giving Fathom-Lord Karathress a solid night of attempts. You’ll notice I wrote “attempts”, because we had heard the horror stories and experienced for ourselves the three-shotted tanks, mana-less healers and “what the *@#& just happened?” moments that characterize this encounter. It was with this mind-set that we entered his room and buffed ourselves, flasking, eating and enchanting until the room glowed like the reactor core of nuclear power station. (only with more hooves, fur and summoned demons complaining bitterly about having to share a dimension with Run)

We had a secret weapon this time though. We had expanded upon our time-worn strategy, with wisdom and tactics gleaned from Sun-Tzu’s Ancient Art of War itself. Long had we labored over this addition - writing, refining and setting in stone an addendum so complete, so complex, so overwhelmingly all-encompassing that it threatened to break free of the magical tome in which it was wrought and unleash a wave of destruction upon the world, obliterating life as we know it.

But that didn’t happen.

What was this addendum, you’re probably asking yourself at this point. What was this shining beacon of hope, this seed of imagination.. what stroke of brilliance could possibly hold a candle to “Don’t die”? We shall quench your thirst for this knowledge, and end your suffering. Behold, in all its glory!

THE ADDENDUM:

“Don’t let others die.”

You may take a few moments to compose yourselves. I know that was a lot to take in all at once.

Anyway, getting back to the fight. As you may have surmised, we were prepared. Testacrush had even gone so far as to enchant his magical fairy wand with Mongoose, and Run had chugged down a gallon of anti-freeze and worn his prettiest lingerie for his encounter with Tidalvess. How could we lose?

We had two false starts when Sharkiss’ pet got the overwhelming urge to sniff some flasked ass, and bolted off towards a random healer right on the pull. Much leg humping commenced and we are sorry to say the owners of the aforementioned legs shall never walk again. After investing in a leash and a muzzle, we pulled Karathress again, ready to learn the nuances of the fight. Sharkiss went down a short while later, muttering something about us getting what’s coming to us in 2.3. We kicked his pet and then ran across to Tidalvess who was rather surprised to see us, and even more surprised to be staring at his own ass from the afterlife. Onwards we went to Caribdis, where approximately twenty thousand people were attempting to interrupt her heals while she made “Shhhhhhhick, shhhhhhhhhick” noises and asked Testacrush what his rating was.

She too went down like one of Run’s dates and we advanced on Karathress himself, where Mel was beating his latest hasty retreat from the most recent spitfire totem trying to burn a hole in his pants. Some leet DPS and scorched Naga ass later and Karathress collapsed to the floor, accompanied by cries of “What the hell was that?” and “You’re kidding me, right?” on vent. Indeed, after all the preparation, psyching up and a fortune in consumables, we’d have to class Fathom-Lord Karathress as quite possibly the biggest anti-climax in WoW to date. We replaced Mel’s pants, forced Run to wear a pair of pants and gave Eluras a shiny new trinket.

After giving Leotheras a try or two, we are pretty confident that he too will be joining his Naga buddies in the great big Aquarium in the sky shortly.

Big grats to everyone involved in the kill, and to Affliction for another great achievement.

This entry was posted on Friday, October 26th, 2007 at 4:47 pm and is filed under General. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.